conviction. [183]

i have so many convictions. so many thoughts.
they come out better in conversation.
i feel distant from everything in life. it's making me physically sick.

dear God, bring me closer to You. closer to everything. closer to the heart of this world. bring any sort of pure passion. make me whole again. fill the gaping hole in my soul. only You can. bring tears to my eyes. God, let me lay everything out before You. my life. my love. my heart. my soul. my everything. help me make it Yours. i can't do it on my own. everything's falling apart. i have no where to turn. i've left the only one who's truly loved me for every inch of my being. Lord, i'm coming home. coming back. slowly but surely, i'm coming back to You. let me find my love in You. heal this black heart and make it new.
amen.